From The Archives

Paris was our second major trip together, and on our way back to the states, Jeff and I had a 12-hour layover in Morocco. The airline set us up in a hotel in Casablanca after an hour of not knowing what was going on when a man greeted us asking if we were who we were while pointing to our names on a sheet of paper. He led us to the front of the customs line, not explaining where we were going, why our names were on a list or really, who he was. In hindsight, it was totally stupid of us to not ask questions and just follow someone we didn’t know in a foreign country who spoke a language I can only describe as beautiful squiggles. But we were young. And infinite.

We giggled ourselves silly behind closed doors in our Moroccan room, spoke about the hookah pipe from Casablanca that Jeff inherited from his grandfather, who we learned loved that city, and marveled at our view of the Atlantic and how different the air felt on our skin. I can’t believe I only gave this image a passing glance 3.5 years ago but outside of our hotel was where this photo was born.

Casablanca, Morocco — AUGUST 2006

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For another fun story about our trip to Paris in regards to a Polaroid we left there for our friends to find, see this post.

10 New Years Resolutions Every Photographer Should Make

1. I will learn how to use my camera.
2. I will not use the Auto setting on my camera.
3. I will not use on-camera flash.
4. I WILL NOT BE HINDERED BY THE GEAR I DO NOT HAVE.
5. I will shoot in RAW.
6. I will learn how to process my shots.
7. I will share my photos with others on the web.
8. I will accept critiques of my work.
9. I will set goals and be proactive about my photography career.
10. I will connect with other photographers.

You can read up on these resolutions in detail in this article by Lisa Bettany. I have never been to her site before reading this post but will most certainly take the time to look through and see what other delicious tid bits I’ve been missing. Resolution #4 is one that I personally struggle with. Maybe it’s because I had the liberty of playing with so much expensive equipment in my heydays that I think I need more than what I have to be successful, but so many amazing photographs have been made with just a hole in a box so I think I should be able to do just fine with my Nikon even though everyone talks crap about it compared to Canon. I’m one of them. But who cares what kind of gear you use. What’s important is what comes out of it.

Here’s to getting out of my own way!

Sidenote: One of my pet peeves is when someone says they “edit their photos,” when they really mean “process their photos.” Editing is the act of selecting the images you want to work with from your days’ shoot…”Editing down to 20 images and then processing them in photoshop.” I guess it doesn’t matter if it’s someone who’s not in the photo business but just thought I’d throw the correct industry terminology out there.

Good Writing Never Goes Out of Style

With the passing of author J.D. Salinger on Wednesday, I’ve spent some time reading lengthy obits and stories about him. I’ve probably read The Catcher in The Rye at least four times in my adolescence and I think it’s safe to say that it’s definitely made an impression on my life.

In April 1972, the New York Times Magazine published an article called “An 18-Year-Old Looks Back On Life,” by Joyce Maynard. That article got her a lot of fan mail, including mail from Salinger, which developed into a long correspondence and eventually, a romantic relationship. I think it takes a good writer to make an great writer go “wow” so I looked up the article and man, was I totally into it. First of all, you read the title and think “an 18-year-old looks back on life? How much experience can an 18-year-old really have?” But her article was just so well written and defines an era which I think makes it a really important piece. I was completely entertained, and with beautiful sentences such as “…we were torn — wanting to run for shelter but tempted, also, to sing in the rain,” who wouldn’t be? It’s quite lengthy and I hate reading articles and long posts online because I find it annoying that I can’t hold it, bring closer, make marks in the margins and be able to feel the pages between my fingertips, but this article kept me scrolling. I actually copied and pasted the article into a word document and considered printing it out until I realized it would use up a dozen sheets of my precious printer paper. I don’t think I could ever jump into the virtual book craze for these very reasons but then again I thought it was completely insane when TV shows were starting to be released on DVDs and that people would actually spend their hard-earned money on them. I mean c’mon! You can watch them on TV! But yeah, we’re now owners of more TV series on DVDs than I’d like to admit. My first purchase was the box set of My So-Called Life…and I justified that because you actually couldn’t watch it on TV anymore.

So without further adieu, if you have some spare time, I suggest reading Maynard’s article: http://www.nytimes.com/specials/magazine/seventies1.html If anything, I think it will prompt you to reflect on trends and important milestones and news events that happened while you were growing up…and that’s always fun.

10,031 Days Old

“The irony of commitment is that it’s deeply liberating — in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around as rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.”
__Anne Morriss, The Way I See It #76

Creative’s Block

As it turns out, I am my own worst enemy.

A new acquaintance of mine wrote that “admitting your insecurities isn’t a weakness, it’s a strength.” And though it makes much sense, it’s sometimes hard to be strong when you know you’re weak.

I’ve been struggling greatly with self-doubt lately, mostly in the business areas of my life. I think I really felt it at the writer’s conference when I was among all of these seriously accomplished writers which I probably should’ve seen as inspiration but instead let it make me feel insecure. I have a degree in journalism but a passion for photography. Though the two definitely go hand-in-hand, I’m terribly worried about becoming a Jane of two trades and master of neither.

I picked up a book many moons ago called The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks and Win Your Inner Creative Battles. It was in the Self-Help section which I never thought I’d find myself perusing. Never really gave it a chance but definitely felt the need to pick it up recently. It’s nicely set up in that it’s almost like a devotional…most of the suggestions/realizations fit on a page so it doesn’t have to be read chapters at a time for you to get anything out of it. As the one line review that is quoted on the cover suggests, it really is “a vital gem…a kick in the ass.”–Esquire.

Despite my self-deprication and nervousness which left my palms sweaty all day, my class (the one that I co-taught) at the conference went really well. They even applauded us at the end (out of pity, perhaps) but I’m sure the students could tell that I was terribly nervous off the bat. I’ve always thought that I wanted to teach, and still think that I do, but maybe next time to a group of students who are younger than me…I think the bulk of my nervousness was from standing in front of a group that was older which made me feel less authoritative. Also, I’m short. And sometimes that translates into making me feel small in other ways too.

There were a few notes that I jotted down from the keynote speaker, radio essayist, Janis Jaquith, not as writing tips but more of things to help you stay positive and realize that it’s ok if the majority don’t get what is that you’re trying to put out there. She spoke about “brain zaps,” which unofficially refers to what happens when you “get” what someone is trying to say…from the mind of the author to your mind, you get it. It zaps. And you re-read it, underline it, copy it into your Moleskine so that you can refer to it again later. Often times I have been afraid to write because really, who cares what I think. But Janice reassured me by simply saying:

“We write to connect to another mind,” and how as a writer (or really, any kind of artist) you amazingly “have a shot at life after death because your audience may not have been born yet…sometimes you’re just waiting for the right reader to come around at the right moment.”

Ironically I’ve recently been seeing a surge in posts/links/articles about self-doubt, tips to get you going (in photography) and I’m hoping these will help me get over this rut. In all honesty, I miss Brooklyn and the experiences it presented, but I think that had a lot to do with my amazing group of friends. It’s hard living miles away from your loved ones who inspire and push you and I have to admit I haven’t found anyone here that has lived up to the great friends that I have in NYC (my husband doesn’t count–he totally inspires me but I need my girlfriends here to talk about stickers and jelly beans too). As I wrap up this post though, I have received an email out of the blue from one of my bestest friends from the city asking if she could come visit me. I think she knew that I needed her even though we hadn’t really corresponded for a few weeks. I love it when you put something out there and just say it to yourself or say out loud to the world…and then all of the sudden you get a response. That happens to me a lot. And Jeff keeps telling me to say that I wish we had a million dollars. If only it really worked like that…

Roanoke Regional Writer’s Conference III — JANUARY 2010

Push Your Ideas

Rethink Scholarship at Langara 2010 Call for Entries from Rory O'Sullivan and Simon Bruyn on Vimeo.

Labors of Love

I used to be obsessed with typewriters (at one point I had five at once) but I loved them for both the purpose they were made for and also just to use as props in photos. I suppose the reasons I’m drawn to them is because I’ve always appreciated the manual work that you have to put into things that come out of it…same probably goes for why I still love to shoot film. Our friends, TeeJay and Sheena, gave us a really great card on our wedding day that was typed on a typewriter on their way to our ceremony. TeeJay typed it in the car with the typewriter in his lap (the primitive version of a laptop I guess) while Sheena drove them up from North Carolina in the pouring rain. What I wouldn’t give to have been in the back seat of that car witnessing this scene—makes for a beautiful photograph in my head. Anyway. While going through my backup drives, I found a scan of this old emulsion lift that I made for Jeff during our first year of dating. I typed some words on a piece of paper, took a polaroid of that same typewriter, lifted the emulsion from the polaroid and placed it on the paper that I typed on and gifted it to him. Just thought I’d post it for funsies…in addition to a polaroid of him against that same wall that was taken at an earlier date. He looks so young and timid =)


Your Best Shot: Nuptials

Jeff’s photo of us in our room at The Hotel Roanoke on our wedding night has been featured on flickr’s blog today in the category of Your Best Shot: Nuptials. How fun! And I just realized that one of the tags that he added to this photo was “I get a little misty-eyed when I look at this.” Aww :)

September 26, 2009

Things I Read Then Write In My Moleskine

“Sometimes looking at the sky makes me sad because I don’t know if the stars are still alive. The moon was very yellow the last nights and appeared very much like in the books when I was smaller. I find it hard to believe that the sky is the same everywhere and only we turn around and around. We’re restless and the stars are not. I wanted to say goodbye, but maybe I don’t have to. There’s still sand in the corners of my suitcase and four full bottles of sunscreen. This year, the sun is only going to kiss my skin and not bite it.”

September 2007 — HOLDEN BEACH, NC

Writer’s Conference

My editor (I love saying that because it makes me sound so official) has asked me if I’d be willing to team up with him and teach a class on photography at the Roanoke Regional Writer’s Conference which will be held at Hollins University on January 22-23rd. My first thoughts were that of honor and excitement. But then that quickly turned into terrified giddiness with horror. I hate public speaking and scenarios where all eyes are on me which is why I tend to hide behind the camera and pen/computer. But I’ll be talking about doing what I love and will have someone else up there to be the comedy relief so hopefully that will help ease the nerves. If you live in Roanoke or the surrounding areas and are a writer, this conference is for you. NPR essayist, Janis Jaquith, is the featured keynote speaker and the conference offers 24 classes that will cover Writing and Social Media, Translating Your Work to Film/Stage, Self-Publishing, and other et ceteras.

So without further adieu, visit Dan’s blog (that’s my editor) to read a blurb on the class we’ll be conducting. And if you’re interested, check out the entire list of classes and presenters. While I was reading the bios of the presenters to see who I wanted to meet and take classes from I kind of jumped when I saw a photo of myself. This was a last minute addition to the schedule and I didn’t realize they’d have the chance to add me to the list. Or feel I was even important to mention. Surprise!